So this is actually my boyfriend’s mate’s date story, but it’s so horrifically genius I’ve told EVERYONE.
FYI… this is not a pretty story and make sure you’ve already eaten before reading this.
So this guy was casually dating a new lady in his life. They went out for a curry together and then went back to his place. He mentioned at this point to my boyfriend that he had bit of a dicky tummy before heading to bed…He said he woke up in pain from his dicky belly and realised he had ‘soiled’ himself in the bed with his new lady friend laying next to it. He ran to his bathroom, cleaned himself up and then apparently gone back to the bed and nudged her into the soiled patch! Then crept back into the other side of the bed. His plan was to make her think SHE had done it instead of him. She woke up mortified and crying from embarrassment and saying how sorry she was. He told her it was ok and not to worry about it.
She did obviously realise shortly afterwards that it actually wasn’t her. I don’t think they went back out after that… No surprise
I don’t think I’d call a guy after he rolled me in his poop.
Ps. His friend is in his 30s.